just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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