she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
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If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
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