Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
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She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
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I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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