Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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