It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
