I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
