Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
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I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
