You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
