you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize