a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
