Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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