you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
