Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
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