You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
