Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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