Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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