You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize