ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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