Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
