You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
