I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
only you would photoshop your dick
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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