So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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