he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
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When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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