Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
