At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize