do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I can text with my tongue
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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