i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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