Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
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