You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
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