There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
