tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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