I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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