It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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