I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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