im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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