Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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