how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
