He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
