I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
its liver damage thursday