if you like me you must not know who I am
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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