Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
