Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
