we're chasing vodka with high fives
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
