It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
