yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
How does one acquire holy water?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You are a genius and a whore.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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