We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
