dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Randomize
