before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
