I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
where does the pee come out of this thing
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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