I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
