yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize