I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
too bad you live with your parents still
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
